belonging: Culture, Connection & the Chaos of the Family Table
"Family gatherings: where your aunt critiques your life choices, your cousin starts a debate no one asked for, and someone always forgets you're vegan."
Easter, birthdays, weddings, 'just popping by' Sundays—whatever the occasion, family gatherings have a way of stirring the pot (and we’re not just talking about the gravy).
For those of us navigating multi-cultural families or friendship circles, it can feel like walking a tightrope between honouring our heritage and keeping the peace. You want to bring your full self to the table—your values, your flavours, your rhythms—but not everyone knows how to receive that.
So how do we balance belonging with boundaries? How do we stay connected without compromising our culture?
The Invisible Pressure of "Fitting In"
Let’s be real. The pressure to "blend in" during family time is real. Maybe your music’s too loud, your spices too strong, your outfit too bold, your language too unfamiliar. Even in spaces that are meant to be safe and loving, difference can sometimes feel like a spotlight.
But culture isn’t an inconvenience. It’s a gift. And the more we water ourselves down, the more we lose the stories, flavours, and wisdom we were meant to pass on.
REESET the Family Table
Here’s the radical idea: family connection doesn’t have to mean cultural compromise. It *can* mean curiosity, celebration, and the kind of storytelling that feeds more than just your belly.
So next time you’re invited to a family table (chosen or blood), try this:
🍛 Bring a Dish That Speaks Your Language
Whether it’s your grandma’s curry, your mum’s tamales, or your version of jollof rice—food tells stories. Don’t apologise for its spice, its smell, or its origins. Let it speak for you.
🎵 Share Your Soundtrack
Offer to play a few songs from your culture during downtime or meal prep. Music is an emotional bridge. Even if they don’t understand the words, they can feel the vibe.
📖 Tell the Stories
That dish? That song? That ritual? Share where it comes from. Share why it matters. Most people don’t reject culture—they just haven’t been taught how to hold it with care.
🧘🏽 Know Your Boundaries
You don’t have to explain everything. You don’t owe access to every part of your identity. You can share with generosity *and* protect what’s sacred.
🧡 Celebrate the Shared
Is there a way to blend cultures at the table? A fusion dish? A moment of gratitude in multiple languages? Connection doesn’t mean losing yourself—it means finding common ground while honouring difference.
A Table Where You Belong
At REESET, we believe culture is something to bring, not hide. Especially at the table. Because when we allow space for multiple cultures to coexist, we build deeper belonging for everyone.
So this Easter (or any gathering), remember: you don’t have to shrink to fit. You don’t have to translate your soul. You get to show up in full colour, full flavour, full volume.
And if someone still forgets you’re vegan? Well... there’s always snacks in your bag.
